I live with a mother who has a high calling to be a mother. It became very evident when were were living in Linn County, Oregon in the early 80s. Kathy heard a public service announcement regarding the county's Social Services Department that was in desperate need of foster parents. We had two pre-schoolers at the time and we were on the pastoral staff of a large church in Albany, Oregon. After several discussions about the logistics of fostering children, and the consideration of moral and humanitarian implications, we signed up to take the classes and become foster parents. While Kathy and I are solidly pro-life, we are not protesters. We would probably never feel comfortable standing in front of a Planned Parenthood office or abortion clinic with a sign. But given the fact that at any given time there are approximately 500,000 children in foster care in the United States, caring for a child in this situation seemed to us to be a way to declare our commitment to life, to a watching world that seems to discard children without any remorse or second thought.
I must admit, Kathy was the primary care giver. I assisted her with a lot, but she is the one who cared for each child 24/7, took them to doctor appointments, took them for visits with their parents, met with the social workers, etc. There is not enough room to tell any of the stories, but each child was a story, including our very first baby with a huge hole in her heart that made her unadoptable. Our task was to care for her while treatment was decided on and then get her through the surgery(s) that would be needed and all the other things she would need. Before any of this took place, we had her dedicated in a church service and God healed that hole. Everyone who knew of her case was totally amazed.
I'm not sure how many children we had in our home in Oregon, but there were several, including the birth of our third child, Josh. When we moved to South Carolina, we were both working full time at Heritage USA, but we also cared for newborn pre-adoptive babies. We had several babies in SC, each time when they left our home to go to their adopted home, the new parents spent the night before the transfer with us in our home. One couple brought their video camera and videoed everything, including changing dirty diapers, feeding, especially burping, it was quite hilarious. Kathy was the perfect mother to turn over a new baby to adoptive parents. She made sure they knew everything they needed to know, and helped make the new parents feel comfortable with their new baby.
When we got to Denver, we were only one of two families that specialized in medically fragile or severely abused children. We saw some real miracles as severely abused babies started the healing process. These children were fortunate to have Kathy as a foster mom. She loved and nursed so many children back to health. It was in Denver where we adopted our three children who were not adoptable because of their birth problems, both medical and because their mothers abused alcohol or drugs while they were pregnant. I still remember the forms we had to sign for Nicole. The disclaimer form was longer than anything I have ever seen. They wanted to make sure that we went into this adoption with our eyes wide open. I thought we would stop at one, or two, but it was mom, Kathy, who couldn't turn a child away. Today we have three teenagers in our home that we love dearly. Even though they have presented some unique challenges, they are wonderful children.
There have been times when I have sat back and been awed by Kathy's commitment to children, to watch her love and care for them without any regrets or selfishness. She has given up a lot over the years to do this, (35+ children) but somehow I think that she wouldn't have changed a thing. For her, motherhood is a high calling.
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