Yesterday marked exactly nine months since Kathy and I started on a journey of unemployment. Never, in my most "worst case scenario" thoughts, did I think I would not have a job by now. The combination of the overall poor economy, churches operating conservatively, my age and general uncertainty, have combined to put us in this "never before in our lives" situation. Last week I was talking with a mortgage re-adjustment specialist and we were going over my income for the past months. Since I didn't have much to put down, he asked how much unemployment pay I was getting. When I told him that the church I worked for did not pay into the unemployment pool, he was amazed that we had not applied for a mortgage re-adjustment sooner. It was great to talk with this man who interviews people all day long with horrendous financial situations, and tell him how, and Whom, was taking care of us.
I must admit, though, that I have had some very difficult days, mixed in with a some great days and a lot of just regular living. Leading up to my birthday last Friday, I was having a difficult Thursday. Early in this process, I had set a threshold that I did not want our savings to go under. In mid January, we got to that threshold. Miraculously, after all the bills, our missions giving, and living expenses were taken care of, we didn't cross the boundary I had set. February started the same way, and again, by the time February was over, we had gotten close, but our savings account was still a little above the line I determined I didn't want it to go under. I have begun to feel a little like the women in First Kings 17. She was out collecting a little firewood to bake a small loaf of bread for she and her son so they could eat it and lay down and die of starvation. Elijah says to her, "Don't be afraid. Go home and do as you have said. But first make a small cake of bread for me from what you have and bring it to me, and then make something for yourself and your son. For this is what the Lord, the God of Israel, says: 'The jar of flour will not be used up and the jug of oil will not run dry until the day the Lord gives rain on the land.'" (Early on, Kathy and I decided that we would continue our missions giving, even if it meant giving something else up that was important, but not as urgent) She went away and did as Elijah had told her. So there was food every day for Elijah and for the woman and her family. For the jar of flour was not used up and the jug of oil did not run dry, in keeping with the word of the Lord spoken by Elijah.
Back to Thursday...so here I was, on one hand rejoicing because of God's faithfulness and feeling like this woman in First Kings, and then at the same time feeling a little panicky because we had a new month, and we had to do it all over again. When I brought in the mail, in among the advertisements, junk mail and a couple of bills, was a card from two of our wonderful friends. Inside the card was a check labeled "Ash Wednesday Offering." It was for an amount that would carry us through half of March! As I held the card, and the check, it felt like my hands were covered in flour and oil. I can imagine Elijah, with a "isn't this fun" look on his face, nodding his approval at God's provision for us. If you are desperate for God's provision, maybe you ought to look in your flour jar...
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